Wednesday, December 06, 2006

typical


so assignment #35 isn't showing up so i'm going to take some brotherly-in-law advice and post it myself. i also noticed that one might not know what my poster says in assingment #10, so i whipped up this diagram in photoshop...hopefully it reads more clearly.


Assignment #35 "Going Anya on ya"

Brent says:
In the morning, Anya, like many, lies in bed. She does so, however,  in a
particularly idiomatic style which... SAYS something. ABOUT something.
Anya's modus operandi is to lie in the carnage of a nightlong battle
recently lost, the victorious entangling bed sheets flung to and fro over
their newly won domain. She lies still, but in a dynamic pose, with
half-closed eyelids, in order to better stay in the bitter, green twilight
between boringly realistic dreams and exotic, dangerous waking life. Then
she gets up. She rubs both of her eyelids with both of her hands; the right
hand rubs counterclockwise, while the left rubs clockwise. Then she
stretches, gets up, and gets cereal. Apple Jacks. The rest of her day is
pretty boring.

...or...

Anya's first activity upon waking is to mentally calalouge which
activities she is going to do. This happens while she lies half-awake, while
she gets ready, and while she is in transit. Next, she walks 3 blocks to the
"L" train. She nearly always arrives one full minute before the train does.
Oddly enough, no matter what the day, she always takes the same train at the
same time in the same direction. She might go either to the laundromat, to
class, to the grocery store, or a cafe. She is normally back at her
apartment by 4:00 pm and then settles down to dinner and conversation with
her roomates. She watches whatever the favorite show of the roomate is,
talking through the commercials. She goes to bed by 10:30. Rinse. Lather.
Repeat.
Katie says:

I know Anya pretty well, so I think I have a pretty
good idea of what she does with her time when I say
that she probably spends a good deal of her time
laughing. I mean, I know she's very busy with school
work and teaching children's classes and keeping up
with her family. At the moment she has a sculpture
project due and a film project due, which is keeping
her busy and probably a bit nervous and stressed, but
I can pretty much guarantee that she is laughing while
she's doing it. Most likely, she's making others
laugh as well. The more stressful the situation, the
more it calls for laughter.

and Husayn says:

Anya is an epic figure who uses her free time in ways unimaginable to
the average human. She is all she can be. She just does it. She's the
one who decided to leave off the ketchup. One afternoon she read all
the Harry Potter books and translated them into Latin to just to prove
that it's not dead. She's an army of one because two of her would just
be unfair. In one weekend she mastered the didgeridoo, the kettle drum,
the theremin, and the subtle art of beatboxing to create her first punk
symphony. She is the new black. She's the one who named it the bean.
She's already made an album for every state. Twice. If it wasn't for
her Johnny Depp would be alone, ugly, and living on the street. And
she's the one who inspires all the graffiti. She also goes to school.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

ha ha ha - This is simply awesome, Anya! I think you win the 'Best Post of the Year' award. :-)

Anonymous said...

Nathan and I were reading your blog tonight, and he says out loud "Going Anya on ya?", then starts to laugh really hard and says "I just got that". Then he thinks for a second and says, "Now I understand why so many people want to call her Onion". I'm not really sure what I'm trying to get at, it just made me laugh.

Katie

Anonymous said...

Unfortunately, when I said the thing about "onion," it didn't have anything to with the other. I was so tired that this was the thought process in that moment of reflection:

[me: Going Anya on ya. No way! Anya sounds like "on ya".
me: Yeah! It does!
me: Brilliant! Hmmmm... what else sounds like Anya? On ya. On yawn? Onion!!
me: You don't think that's why...?
me: That's it!]
me (outloud): Now I understand why so many people want to call her Onion.

anya said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
anya said...

sometimes when i can see people struggling with my name i just say, "it's an-ya. like on-ya, off-ya." it's what i wrote on my graduation name card and it worked perfectly. except that i had made him laugh into the mic.