oh, who am i kidding?

i'll just sit in the financial aids office all afternoon. it's a wednesday, why not?

it's official, beyond official, i love chicago. everytime i am forced to explore the city on my own (for sketches) i see another part of the city and all it has to offer.

and i love it.

i love walking around, i love imagining i live next to the MCA and going every tuesday to the farmers market for fresh fruit, veggies, home-made bread and gorgeous! flowers. then going for a run at the track behind the MCA...and so forth and so forth. the only thing that pulls me out of these daydreams while walking are the coffee shops. i see them and think, "and that's where i can read the paper and drink my coffee in the mornings--wait i don't drink coffee...(long paus, while thinking why i was thinking about drinking coffee at that cafe)...i don't live here." it's a rude, abrubt ending to my imaginings and at the same time a much needed one (i can get carried away, away). so i guess what i'm saying is that chicago is my kind of city and i see myself here for awhile (i don't know where else i'd go, but yeah).

woot-woot.

as for the crazyness that is my schedule, this week has been oh-so-much-better. not working on mondays have opened up much needed time to complete work and well, relax a wee-bit. but what still is frustrating is architecture. i feel that it is close to what i want to do, but not. ?? any ideas? ...anybody?

well, quite frankly i feel like i should take this moment to say how much i miss everybody these days...

first off i must say, suzanne and husayn: man, i miss you guys. yeah i know i live with you, but i never see you any more and it make me sad. i miss you guys (like seriously, for the split seconds i see you guys in the morning i just want to run up and give you guys big bear hugs, straight-up grandma lehman style).

katie and nathan: i can't wait until christmas break when we can sit on the couch at home and just laugh (at everybody..in a loving way) haha. i miss you guys SO much more than you know.

sara: oh sara, what can i say. when dad mentioned us moving to oak park together my first thought was, "oh that so is going to happen." and when the two travelers on the el remided me of two people on the amazing race i thought, "sara and i so need to do that. we would have fun, we would rock and america would love us (i mean look at us, really, how could they not?)" and when liza told me about your reaction to "the news" it sounded so like you, i could see you saying it facial expressions, hand movements and all. sara i miss you and your little (she has gotten skinny) too.

liza and brent: you live down the street, i see you as often as i eat a home-made meal (which is unhealthily few and far between). brent, i want to take you shopping. liza, i want you to come. think about it, we would have fun unlike the day that was full of all that is pathetic (even though we has a little fun that day...or as much fun as one can have on a day that was full of all that that is pathetic). oh, the servere PDA offenders came into p*nea the other day...oh that cute couple. yeah, i miss hanging out with you guys (and i'm still waiting for a happy hug!)

---sidenote: i kind of feel like i'm dying or something, but i'm not. i just miss you people----

family in b-town: i love you guys and just being home for 11 hours on saturday night was just what i needed. way to keep home, home. way to be and keep it up! i miss you guys and come decemeber i'll be home again.

luxions: we need to party, up in your house (blaring anastasia). i miss y'all!

and everyone else that i haven't seen in forever or laughed hard with in awhile or babysat in awhile...i miss you!

----------------------

This could be the very minute
I'm aware I'm alive
All these places feel like home

With a name I'd never chosen
I can make my first steps
As a child of 25

This is the straw, final straw in the
Roof of my mouth as I lie to you
Just because I'm sorry doesn't mean
I didn't enjoy it at the time

Goodness knows I saw it coming
Or at least I'll claim I did
But in truth I'm lost for words

What have I done? it's too late for that
What have I become? truth is nothing yet
A simple mistake starts the hardest time
I promise I'll do anything you ask...this time